"Aha moment"

I was looking into myself, I was ashamed for what I had ate that day and ashamed I haven't been working out. I felt really depressed and in despair I didn't know what to do. I hopped into the shower so I could wallow alone, so I could have no one bother me. In the shower I wanted to  let all my emotions out and its where I felt safe to feel my feelings. I started thinking and asked God why? Why can I repent when I treat my body horribly with food but still have the repercussions it has on my body. I had a soothing feeling come over me and it gave me a moment to let me be me. It took my panic, anxiety and constant nag of how I should feel act and look. It allowed me to be who I truly am and feel what I feel. I realized my body is beautiful because God gave it to me as a gift and its beautiful because he made it this way. I felt peace as these things were popping into my head. Then from myself  I felt intense fear that I wasn't worried about what my body looked like and started to panic. Then I had another calming thought "why people take care of their bodies, its because they want to be happy with what they look when they look at them selves. But not in a way that is pressured by society, media or what other people think of you. But something that says you are healthy and you love yourself, You take care of your body because you love yourself and when you are over weight eat bad foods you are not showing your body that love. When you eat right exercise your body will be beautiful because you take care of it. Yes! Its clicked!